- "You have to"
- "You must"
If anybody is going to tell me either of the above, it must be accompanied by a valid reason. Plus the said reason must make sense. And in my opinion, anyone who complies with (1) and (2) without asking questions is a pushover who does not know their rights. Especially if it's not their normal practice to do whatever it is that is required of them.
"If you don't there will be repercussions"
If said "repercussions consist of displeasing some people because I did not conform to what they expected of me, too bad. If someone is unhappy that I did not do something or behave in a certain way, they better have a good reason for their said displeasure. Saying: "I expect you to just because I do" does not cut it.
I absolutely detest it when I am expected to do something or behave in a certain way just because everyone else is dancing to the general tune. As far as I am concerned, there were many instances when I refused to conform and news flash: I have yet to be struck down by lightning! I have encountered a few sour faces yes, but I am not inclined to bother myself with what these sour faces think.
In my opinion, nobody should be forced or pressured to:
- Do what they don't want to.
- Go where they don't want to.
- Be nice to people they don't like.
- Not to say what they think or express an opinion because people might not like it.
Even if the people doing the pressuring are say family.....relatives, the powers that be at work, or simply people who think they are important enough to tell other people what to do or how to act.
Family should respect you for who you are, employers hire you to perform a task for which you are paid for. It's a fair exchange and not a master-slave relationship. Hence they have no business trying to mould your personality to suit their tastes or dictate what you do after office hours. As for people who think they are so....... superior that they can push others around, sooner or later they will meet their match. It always happens somewhere down the road.
Of course there is no discounting the fact that when a person refuses to conform, they won't be popular and will attract resentment. At work there might be no pay rise or promotion, within the family circle they might not be the favourite daughter, son, niece, nephew etc. Well it takes guts, a certain amount of steel and courage to take the path untrodden.
Being original has always been a lonely business. A path usually taken only by loners and the unconventional. Every society is gifted with a sprinkling of such individuals and the masses that make up the numbers and live their lives by rules God ONLY knows who wrote and set down as the Bible!